version 3.0 - "Lady of the Moon"

2004-02-11T17:17:00.000-08:00

okay, this is just to inform you i will be deleting two of my blogs:

Lady of the Moon
and
Death in the Light

because it takes soo much time and energy to write on a single blog, much less on two.
i will, instead, focus on the live journal my sister so lovingly made me. ;P

that's it then!
be seein' yah!

2004-02-03T18:06:00.000-08:00

STUPID!

posted kanina. realllly long entry.

stupid computer picks a friggin' fine moment to crash.

*goes off cursing*

2004-01-21T18:27:00.000-08:00

hey, online again! ^_^

me on a roll...i think.

anyway, change of [mailing] address:

136 Conrad St. Moonwalk Subdivision P'que MMLa.

i don't have a phone yet...the phone company said it's gonna take then fifteen days to disconnect our line and reconnect it in our new house. *roll eyes* whoopee-doo. *sighs*

anyway, my boy and i are still going strong. *smiles* thankfully. i'm praying it will work out this time around. we're nearing our seventh monthsary. he bought me a guinea pig named choco. :) can you believe it?

hm...scholl [still sucks], some things never change. i [still] don't know who my 'real' barkada is.
i don't really have time to mingle because jes has been more possessive lately. my friends take it as a good sign.

sis, what happened to the shout outs? and can someone make me a new template, pweesh? *puppy-dog eyes*

okay, me gonna go check out other people's bloggies.

love y'all.

2004-01-18T17:52:00.000-08:00

src="http://test3.thespark.com/ba/bitch48.gif"
border="0">

yeah baby!

2004-01-16T00:50:00.000-08:00

minna-chan!!!!!!!!!!!!

DOES ANYBODY STILL READ MY BLOG? :)

okie, i have no excuse as to why i haven't blogged in almost two frickin' months.
aside from the fact that...well...the internet access in school is always in demand, etc...this is actually the only time i have to sneak in. anyway, jesse and i are still going string...six months already. (i'm his longest standing girlfriend!) [enter applause here]

anyway, i bought a new phone!
it's the nokia music phone...the 3300. so you people can send me colored wallpapers! mwahahahaha! it's really cool and i have the distinction of being the unique few who have it. ;> all thanks to my birthday money.

hmm...i'm not sure when i can meet up with The Pantheon since my wednesdays are all full. [xe: noey already met jes...i'm sure she's made kwento.]

school still sucks. i miss everyone terribly :( my sisters, brothers, the hskada, and everyone in between...

i'm gonna go look at other people's bloggies now. oh, by the way:

angel sanctuary

my friend's blog.

love you all!

2003-11-28T01:31:00.000-08:00

i see you're still here.

thank god for small favors.
it's good to know there are people who will love you no matter what.
'love' is too strong a word for you, but i'm thankful that you're [technically] still here.

fic-log. :) i'm rarin' to post my prose et poetry. [there's a fair amount already!] ^^

kai, i haven't seen nor heard from you in such a loong while. MIZYOU!

harle, I MISS YOU SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!! there's nothing i'd rather do than go straight over to la salle and just make kulit. :) you have a weird way of making me feel...ah...calmer.

you've been onlne but you haven't been posting. hrmph. call me sometime? miss our bonding na.

D, i had the luxury of visiting your blog today. you're another person i REALLY want to talk to. i mish u sis... :)

SIS!!!!!!!!!!! :) how's hong kong? i hate thinking that you're a few hundred miles away. makes me miss you even more. the distance between p'que and qc is bad enough, doncha think?
i love you, you know i'll always love you. :)

that's all the time i have. do post. miss you all.

i'm sticking with you.
--> said to me yesterday.

2003-11-20T23:35:00.000-08:00

guess who's still alive?

*slight smile*

hello y'all!
i've missed being in this place. well, i'm supposed to be in class but since the ever-lovin' genius streak in me decided to pop up, i finished the freakin' exercises much earlier than expected. *preens* [enter applause here]

anyway...okay. it's time to let the cat out of the bag.

we broke up 1.34 this morning.

i cried unbelievably hard. [prose material on this available ^^]
so you're wondering why am i so cheerful?
we decided "it wasn't time to end it".

it's still us.

and for that i am wholly grateful.

anyway, apologies for missing all the previous wednesday meetings...mark my words i am going to miss a helluva lot more. *winces* explanations are due:

MW
10.30-12
1.00-2.30
4-6

TTh
8.30-10
10.30-12
1.30-3

F
9-12
1.30-4.30

there we go. hmph.

so...yun.
school has been verily hectic. i don't like going to school anymore because most of the bloody subjects suck and...well, in a word, there's just no point in bustin' my brains without him to support me. *pouts* well, actually it's started getting better. my friends are all guys who refer to me as 'Mobster Momma' because i'm the only girl and i'm the most 'angas'.

me...angas. can you believe it?

anyway, i hope someone can help me make a new template for this.
the purple's starting to hurt my eyes.
if there are any takers, i'd like the background to be in light grey and the font to be in...oh, dark blue i guess. :)

i hope someone actually still reads my blog these days...

love you all!

2003-10-01T23:55:00.000-07:00

after 10 years...THE GODDESS (still) LIVES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i tried posting a while ago but the server bogged down and i was left with an empty screen, so i was understandably very pissed.

anyway, yesterday was a mighty fine (wednes)day coz i finally got my lazy tush (your term, ielle) over to a grand wednesday meeting ^_^
i saw all my sisters and am therefore VERRRY pleased. i also saw my one-and-only twin and that is definitely an added bonus. i missed kai though... *pouts* hopefully i'll see her some other fine day.
yesterday was additionally great because my boy was extra-sweet (with mush on the side, no less). im not gonna gush, though, don't worry. i'm also gonna convince him (somehow) to get his lazy tush to a wednesday meeting.

anyway, shout-outs to y'all.

Ielle: gad, i've missed you so, sis! rest assured that when i make up my mind to finally 'share' the darker part of my thoughts, you'll be the first to know. you have no idea how much strenght i've derived from you lately. thank you. :)

Mai: you're not a bad girlfriend. you're not even a bad friend. and it's not right for you to feel that way because the only one we want you to be is yourself. :) i love you always!

dani: WAIIIIIIIIIII! it's always good to see you because you're bursting over the top with positive energy :) you always make me feel hyper! ^_^ hehe...thanks for the cebuano lessons. teach me more next week, ne? mwaaah!

sammy: torpe talaga siya, kahit anong gawin natin! i don't know exactly how you're feeling but sis...rest assured we will be here to see you through everything life may toss at you.

kai: gad, where have you been and what have you been up to? you owe me updates girl, i've missed you like hell for so long!

mac: you're an idiot, and a torpe one at that, but you're my twin so *dramatic sigh* i'm still here... :)

charlie: you're too busy for your sisters now! *pouts*

and last but definitely not the least...

ej: bes, go to my blurty...i have something for you (again)... read everything there na lang...

till next time...

"you make me happy...not because of what you do, but because of who you are..." (guess who said this to me one fine day? ^_^)

2003-09-05T03:40:00.000-07:00

hi all!
whoa, i've certainly missed this place :P

apologies, sis. i was supposed to go over to your place but...ah. *hangs head* i kinda snapped at my guy and unloaded a whole lot of stress on him. he stayed with me till six...and he only left 'cos i insisted he go on ahead.

a~nyway, i am also on tokyochat chatting with this one's french fry. (when is he ever gonna get a blog???)

i've also (tried) patching things up with bes ^_^ pare, na-miss kita!

i wholly intend to drop by next wednesday, and i want to see mLina, maRc, mAi, s'Lette, mAc, sAmmY and dOggie !!! ^_^

I MISS YOU ALL SOOO MUCH!!

me going now. more next time.

XXX
athens, i'm sending a letter over :) text me wilya?
XXX

2003-08-21T03:52:00.000-07:00

hi. this is me.

yup i'm still alive. i can't exactly focus...but...well...ah hell.

i'm feeling a little...oh sheesh. a LITTLE? i'm feeling a lot down.

look everyone.

this goes out to the pantheon, the people in my sidebar, and even those who don't go online. i'm too tired to name names and put up links. i hope you all read this.

i miss you all.
wednesday meetings just aren't enough. i haven't exactly done my part in the barkada--ALL my barkadas--and that haunts me.
when was the last time i was there for you? any of you? when was the last time i sat down and listened and cared? when was the last time i picked up the phone and checked out what's going on in your lives?

i haven't been the greatest friend everyone probably wants me to be.

i haven't lived up to my third year high school reputation.

i haven't done anything worth crap.

i'm sorry if i've been to absorbed in my own life.
i'm sorry if i missed various highlights in your lives.

i miss you all. so much. so. much.

there. i guess that's all i can say.
i've been a bad friend.

i love you for who you are and not what you can give me. --jesse (my ray of light)

love you all.

2003-08-06T23:43:00.000-07:00
this is from athena's blog. :)

You are a muse.

What legend are you?. Take the Legendary Being Quiz by Paradox

Your magical style is Magus.

What type of Magic do you work?. Take the Magical Style Quiz by Paradox

wOot.

2003-08-06T23:17:00.000-07:00

Primary
Ability:

Farseeker

Farseekers posses the ability to communicate over great distances via telepathy. They are great friends who know when they're needed, and seem to be able to detect others thoughts.

Secondary
Ability:

Futureteller

Futuretellers have an uncanny knack of knowing what is going to happen, well before anybody else. Alot of futuretellers have truedreams, whereas some, like Brydda, have what they call a 'sixth sense'. Futuretellers are usually very quiet, and reserved, yet they are loyal and trustworthy.

What
is your Misfit Talent?

This stong idealist values friendship highly, and will never give up on those
she loves.

What Obernewtyn Character
are you?

got this from melina's blog. :) do comment.

2003-08-06T23:06:00.000-07:00
wow, it's been...well...more or less a week...since i last posted :)
first of all, updates on my wunnerfully sabog life.

1. for those of you who don't know, i have a new number (again!). the other sim's busted so i
can't use it anymore. this is my number: 09272749416.

2. i've been included in the ms. college pageant. ick. oh--wait. you knew that already.

3. it's my first monthsary. wai.

anyway, yesterday was another wednesday. wOot! i got to mcdo around 3-something, i guess. marc and mai were there, then mac arrived. marc commented that i looked like a swedish nurse in my school uniform. that's loads better than being called a maid!

oh and...i have dark green eyes now :)

and then we hung out for a few hours, trading hentai innuendoes and green jokes, sharing twister/french fries and mcflurrys :)

note: i will kill marc for ruining the color GRAY. i'm now officially sick and tired of the mere MENTION. >P

i'm gonna go blog-hopping first. ;) post again later!

cheers!

2003-07-29T20:28:00.000-07:00
hey all!

i'm in school now. ^_^ yep, the frickin' school actually has internet now. damn.
hehe. it's another bloody wednesday--sometimes i think god DOES love me. >.< yeah i'm sabog. so kill me.

it's partly because ykw's [you know who] right here beside me on the next console searching on--heh--guy stuff i s'pose. no, i don't think he's coming with me later. shit ang gulo ng blockmates ko. but in fairness, it's all pretty fun. :)

for some rather unknown reason i was coerced [read= nauto!] into joining the campus pageant. sheesh. i initially thought that it was only for the [goddamned] acquaintance party but then again...heh...turned out that the pageant is in FEBRUARY. dammit!

anyway. can't concentrate--who the bloody hell can when your boyfriend's trailing his fingers down your neck?

later all!

2003-07-25T20:06:00.000-07:00
whoo, seems that everytime i log onto blogger it looks better and better...*grins* real simple. nice.

anyweiz, it's saturday today and i'm in a netcaf a few blocks away from school. jesse had to go home because his dad's back from abroad. *shakes head* we actually had a mini-tampuhan. but i'm tellin' y'all, WOW, it's worth everything. he's so damn open with himself. :)

quotable quotes:
"i'm not psychic or a psychologist--i just want to know who you are. i can't keep guessing. ayoko maging tanga, krys. i want to know you--all of you. not the airbrushed version."

*swoons*

that's good enough for me!
and for those who may be worried, we're not 'in-over-our-heads'. we love each other [well DUH!!!!!!!!!!] but we know pretty damn well that we have separate lives too.

*smiles*

that's good. very good.

anyway, scurrying away from the [rather touchy] topic of my love life, let's all focus on another issue which has brought about tears, vulgarity, and all-around bad reactions.

kai.

well. that must've gotten a lot of your attention. i haven't exactly vocalized my thoughts yet, so i'll just post here what i posted on her comment box:

...
okay. hurtful comments about. aren't you all gonna see na may point kayong lahat???

kai, you DID say that you were mad at us.
then you told me it was mel.
then you told me it was no one.

i loved you--hell, part of me still does, but...

your reasons don't add up.
i know you don't expect us to understand, and that's good. because frankly, we don't.

i'm semikindasure you don't get yourself as well.

stop looking for yourself in every guy you meet.

kai, the only one you can be truly happy with is yourself.

it's impossible for everything to get back to how it once was, well DUH, but i'm trying not to give up.
kaya lang lahat na nang pwede mong i-damay dinamay mo eh. thomas. nate. kahit si marc naba-bad trip na.

i don't know what to do. i honestly don't.

maybe we all don't know what friendship really is. eh tangina diba MAGKAKAPATID tayo?

think about it, all of you. THINK ABOUT IT.

yun. that's my piece. i have to go meet maia and marc at megaMall.

i'll post more next time.

2003-07-10T17:49:00.000-07:00
THE GODDESS LIVES!!!

:)

okay. i'm alive, people. be happy. i'm currently in the library of my school, shivering. this reminds me vaguely of st.scho. aircons at every room--not that i'm complaining.

there is something all of you should know.
since moving to this school, i've been happier than i've ever been in my entire life.
from how happy my sisters are for me, i reckon it's a good thing. ^^

and athens, i finally have a boyfriend. =p

enter jesse.

he's so darn open and honest it hurts =p naw, seriously...he's great. he makes me happy.
that's what counts isn't it? i know i deserve to be. don't we all?

happyhappyhappyhappy.

*grins*

word for the week: HAPPY!!!

oh, by the way, starting july 14, i'll only be able to drop by mcdo la salle around...say...4.00pm? i have class.
speaking of wednesdays...

PLUG!!!!!!!!! -----> that's marcelle. ^^
muy guapito. too bad he's taken ;p then again, so am i. :)

i'm gonna log off now and read other people's blogs.

cheers!

2003-06-23T00:01:00.000-07:00
okay.
i'm online again, this time in the la salle area. my sis ters and zacky are here. :)
zacky was very sadly coerced by me and kai into paying for our online time. ^^ i love having a twin. incidentally, he also bought me load last...thursday. was it thursday? i think it was thursday.

who'll by me load next week? ;>

anyway i'm trying very hard to look for a picture to upload...

by the way, i need more songs dedicated to me. kale, mai, zack, and athens, you haven't given me any songs. :)

i'm off.

cheers!

2003-06-22T21:13:00.000-07:00

What's Your Outlook on Life?
brought to you by Quizilla

can you believe this? ^^
well i suppose it's a good thing.

anyway, it's a monday and i'm near OLG. i have an idiotic guidance test later at 1.00-pm. yep, i am an hour early. *snorts*
like i care.
sooo...i'm learning a lot of things: guitar, piano, *drums, and html.
>.<
wish me luck.

Insights

i enjoy this new school.
it's challenging in more ways than one.
in st.scho all that mattered to people was beauty and popularity. supposedly i had both so everyone was constantly sucking up to me. in here, everyone's different, it's a challenge to make friends and all. i have an oppurtunity to be 'myself'...nevermind that i don't know what 'myself' is anymore. i can be...technically, whatever i want to be. :)

i'm gonna go edit my template in my dark blog. :)

Love you all...

Cheers ^^

2003-06-19T17:46:00.000-07:00
ohhhhhhhhhhh-kay. sorry for the uber long silence. i haven't been to anyone's blogs yet because it's twenty-six minutes to my first class for the day and i'm still a few blocks away. i couldn't resist. *makes face* anyway, i started school last june 17th...if you're wondering why i didn't post earlier, it's because i was in the middle of typing a really long entry then when the goddamn fuxing lights went out.

stupid lights.

anyway, luv, you're lucky...i don't have time to post your bloopers during sammy-my-luv's birthday last june 6.

hmmmph. i wanted to post that. you were really...funny...then. *snickers* hehe...

anyway, here's my schedule. ^_^

tuesday: 9.30-6.30 [with a measly break of 12-1.30].

wednesday: 12-3 [i will be going to la salle before AND after ^^].

thursday: 11-6 [break from 2-3].

friday: 9-4.30 [break from 12-2.30].

okay. i'm out. i'm searching on my new obsession: xmen evolution. ^^

cheers ^_~

2003-05-28T22:40:00.000-07:00
minna-san! new email: isis21eden@hotmail.com. ^^

and whoever can edit my template for 'the poisoned apple' [my fic log], puh---leeze do! text me and i'll give you my log-in info for blogger. if you can put up a picture of a princess, it would be great. :P heh. blessed be. have to run now. >.<

2003-05-28T22:02:00.000-07:00
i am getting vaguely tired of the scenery in here.

*sighs*

back in ssc. what else is new, eh?

anyway, i will...ah...explain my situation.

sis. Our Lady of Guadalupe is in EDSA. semi-kinda-sorta near Megamall. [that is one good thing.] it's also near the MRT so i can get to LaSalle easily enough. when i get my sched i 'll tell you.

that's where i want to go to. however, my brother shifted to Nursing too, and he's in University of Perpetual whatever. my dad and mom are currently talking it over. UPHR, by the way, is all the way in alabang. *sighs* i went with him once. took us two damn hours. and that was during SUMMER!!!!!

anyway, i'm confused by my own choice. like i said last night:

"krys, what ARE you doing???"

i still don't know. >P

i'm posting something in my blurty for you. it's not much, but it sums a lot up. :) i miss you.

i miss you g i r ls too. ^^ and what have you boys been up to?

flip, we oughta bond more often. :) you're my beloved best-ex-friend.

athena, come back home. :( i miss you TERRIBLY! you're probably the only one who has the guts to call me a doormat to my face...and live. ^^

back to you: i still love you. no matter what.

more later. :)

2003-05-27T20:39:00.000-07:00
well, i'm back outside school yet again. i haven't gone blog-hop-happy yet, but i will---ah...eventually.

first of all, i have news. it's probably bad news for most of you, if not all.

i'm out of st. scho.

i'm shifting to nursing and i'll be going to either the University of Perpetual Help (?) or Our Lady of Guadalupe. both of which, i assure you, are NOWHERE NEAR the University Belt. *sighs*

i'm not even enrolled yet. obvious ba na it was a last minute decision? my grandmother damn near threw a party when she heard the news, she was that happy. the shock hasn't registered yet. [obvious ba?] what the hell...i'll live. but i won't be able to see you guys for a while. *sniff* plus...mauuna kayo mag-graduate. that really sucks. then again, at least you'll all be there...right...?

*sighs*

i'm gonna go look at everyone else's blogs now.

2003-05-20T20:01:00.000-07:00

You're a Diamond. You seem like a cold and an
unreachable person outside, yet you are
beautiful inside and outside. You may be
stubborn at times. You act with grace and
elegance and you are a precious asset to all
your friends.

What Jewel Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

wow. comment please.

(or are you too afraid to break a heart?) ;P

2003-05-20T19:43:00.000-07:00
okay. i'm outside school--*glances at cellphone*--mom just texted demanding that i be home by lunchtime. after this i am supposed to meet up with +sirri+ to give her back her cd, then i'm supposed to sneak off to quad to meet flip, doggy, kale, and my sis ters. minus the currently-voiceless melina. *snickers* that oughta be fun.

anyway, it's rather ironic that i'm going out again exactly a week after my mini-issue.

i guess i never learn.

*sighs*

okay, for what it's worth, my conscience cam crashing down on me sooner than expected, and i actually ended up crying harder than ever. *shrugs* there goes the ice queen act. damn. i LIKED that act.

it's been...what? 10++ days since i last posted. (you do the math. i'm far too tired for that.)

i don't have anything to make kwento...i'm gonna go check out other people's blogs now. blessed be, people.

2003-05-04T23:25:00.000-07:00
okay. went blog-hop happy. i haven't been to other places simply because there is no time. plus i'm a little afraid of what i may find.

See which Greek Goddess you are.

stole this off her blog.

okay, a lot has happened, but i don't want to post it. it takes too much time and frankly, i'm tired.

first of all, i don't...particularly feel like i have done anything worth the pan the on. i just feel like i'm not a part of it. and i'm not saying this because i'm begging to be. actually, i'm feeling very calm right now. [that means i am headed for something very much like a breakdown].

and it's not just the pan the on.
i'm pretty sure a lot has happened to everyone else. and i can't help wondering:

WHAT IS EVERYONE SO THANKFUL FOR???.

in all actuality, i've never felt so useless in my entire life.

everyone tells me they love me.
i don't see how the hell that happened.

i'm sinking to new lows again.

i'm sorry sisters, i'm sorry nii-chans, i'm sorry, prec ious few.

i can't be your angel now.

anyway, i'm moving on to post something angry and something sad.

leave a note. god knows i need it.

2003-04-14T21:01:00.000-07:00
i m n o t c r a z y i m j u s t a l i t t l e u n w e l l . . .

Disorder Rating
Paranoid: Moderate
Schizoid: Low
Schizotypal: Moderate
Antisocial: Moderate
Borderline: Very High
Histrionic: High
Narcissistic: Moderate
Avoidant: Moderate
Dependent: Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive: Moderate

-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --

according to this test, i am most likely to be either histrionic or borderline.

here's more info on both:

Borderline
Borderline personality disorder is characterized by mood instability and poor self-image. People with this disorder are prone to constant mood swings and bouts of anger. Often, they will take their anger out on themselves, causing themselves injury. Suicidal threats and actions are not uncommon. They think in very black and white terms and often form intense, conflict-ridden relationships. They are quick to anger when their expectations are not met.

Histrionic
People with histrionic personality disorder are constant attention seekers. They need to be the center of attention all the time, often interrupting others in order to dominate the conversation. They use grandiose language to discribe everyday events and seek constant praise. They may dress provacatively or exaggerate illnesses in order to gain attention. They also tend to exaggerate friendships and relationships, believing that everyone loves them. They are often manipulative.

i think that histionic would be a good bet. everyone knows i'm manipulative, but i'm so good at it they don't care anymore. i don't interrupt others though. and do i use 'grandiose' language? anyway, you kids judge me.

2003-04-14T20:43:00.000-07:00
i won't be able to post a really long entry because this is my third try. >.< the netshop i'm in has lost it's electricity twice already. >P dammit!
*glances at phone* this one just texted me. unfortunately, i STILL don't have load. besides, i'm waiting for +fiona+ so that i can go over to her place and spend my life there. ^^ 'kay, fine...maybe not.

stupid. i lost all the quizzes i was taking. *shakes head* ugh.

i'll try to get it back, in the meantime, you'l have to put up with this mini-rant (i'm not mad enough to put it here).

it's not always a good thing to be too friendly.
people either misunderstand your intentions or they think you're a flirt. not much of a choice, is there?

the thing is, it's not in my nature to be...a prissy, superior snob. i truly like being nice to people. i like people.
i like helping out, and drawing out their deeper thoughts, and listening to how they really feel, because i know perfectly well that there's always something left unsaid. especially with guys.

i like the fact that guys feel like they can trust me. they feel like they can confide in me, and that makes me feel good--for once--about myself.

some guys think that they can fall in love with girls like me.

that's not always right.

guys think they love me because they feel comfortable with me. and although a good relationship is based on being able to be yourself with someone, that's not how it always works.

there are other people in this world who could love like that. but not me.

i'm usually the sister, the best friend, or the closest female friend the guy has.
i'm not cut out for relationships.

i don't deserve them.

2003-04-05T03:00:00.000-08:00
hey, i'm in another good mood! ^_^ you don't get much of that from me nowadays...

first of all, i had practice for this one's debut. it was...wacky and all-hyped-up, to say the least. we didn't practice in my gramma's house, but at home instead. for a moment, i was afraid that +aids+ was bored/tired/pissed, but when we started on seven rounds of poker with +sirri+, [+fiona+ was practicing her voicing] he pretty much loosened up and started swapping jokes and--of all things--magic tricks.

asked for some advice regarding the Craft from +sirri+, [i WILL ask you when our schedules permit] and i'm pretty much...okay with it now.

on other news, foolish games by jewel is B.E.A.U.T.I.F.U.L.
i was trying to write a songfic for me and viggo-my-heart but decided that the inspiration was all wrong--hence i trashed all three snippets i made. *sighs* i know. i am evil.

in case you failed to notice, in case you failed to see:
this is my heart, bleeding before you,
this is me, down on my knees.

it's beautiful. but you know?

...ah...how do i say this? i think...i am a mean person.
you see, i have a tendency to mess with the minds of those of the male species.
that's why a certain high school--*chokes*--FRIEND of mine called me heartbreaker.
i have to admit, in a way, i am. i am very good at mind games and i certainly know how to flirt.
needless to say, i have a Ph.D in flirting.
you know the book 'the art of seduction'? ^_^

ego speaking:

i wrote that book. ^^

okay, so maybe not. but point is, i know all too well how to hurt people. i have a sixth sense for that. and sometime, the vindictive side in me lashes out at the people i love so damn much.

you know who you are, and i'm sorry.

i read the bitch manifesto this morning. [remember that, +athens+?]
i am a bitch goddess and for what it's worth, i like it.

the thing is, there was a line i liked. it went something like,
bitches are constantly afraid of fragile people. they are always worried about hurting other people.

it's appropriate because i know i am blunt and straight to the point. i also know that some people can't handle my honesty.
but i don't believe in being gentle. being gentle...that's...not me.

should i apologize for being me?

2003-04-01T22:37:00.000-08:00
i am happy because i got VIGGO pics from this one!

it's kinda like an ice cream sandwich. :)
viggo on one side, athens on the other. ^_^

i'm glad to say i'm feeling better, mainly because i met with my twin and my doggie nii-chan last monday, and i met with the wed nes day gang minus these two. i'm a bit disappointed as i miss +kari+ like anything and this one was supposed to meet them all. *sighs* but on other news, +fiona+ is right here beside me .^_^

i've been planning a lot for my beloved sister's debut and i'm praying the programs *ahem* are gonna turn out okay. =D
i can't post it here because SHE's gonna see. *sticks tongue out* MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

did i mention i was happy? ^_^

gonna go quiz-happy stealing quizzes off +maia's+

Eeeeevilll

Find out what anime girl you are.

KEWL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Insanity

Find out what bishonen you are.

LET ME JUST SAY I WAS UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF +FIONA+ WHEN I TOOK THIS QUIZ. ^_^

okay. i will go now. =D

2003-03-30T20:49:00.000-08:00
oH-kay. i'm in school because...i need my class cards. i'm terrified i'll get thrown out of my *ahem* beloved alma mater.
unlikely, you say? GOD. i only pray you're right.

so what has happened to me lately? that would be a good question if i actually had an answer. does the phrase 'great extremes' ring a bell? my mood swings are acting up...and it's not pretty. i know how it feels to go crazy. i know that feeling all too well. and now, i also know how it feels to want to die.
it came to a point i was actually planning it out....figuring out who to write letters to, what to write and all that...you'll never guess what stopped me.
it was the silliest thing, really.

sis, i didn't want to ruin your debut.
*sighs*
i reach new lows everyday.
really. i do.

~*~

hmm...just went to lina's blog. naunahan ako. 'unwell' by matchbox 20 was supposed to be my theme song. >< keyword being supposed. ohhhh dear. i feel vaguely sick.

~*~

there something that bothers me.

everyone overestimates me.
i'm not perfect, guys.

everyone thinks that i'm this person who knows exactly what to say and when to say it. or i'm someone who knows exactly what she wants, who can read people like a book and ...well...in short, they think i'm someone who knows how to handle...everything.

i'm not as strong as i seem, or even as strong as i pretend to be.

inside i'm scared and crying.
and the thing is, i don't even KNOW what i'm looking for. but i know i need it now. soon.

~*~

i know i'm not making sense. but right now nothing does.
i'm lost and completely hopeless and as far as i'm concerned, i. want. OUT!

i want out of this so-called life.

~*~

What Planet Are You From?

this quiz was made by The Autist Formerly Known As Tim

~*~

i am not happy. i want to go back to fifteen years ago. you know i used to be so damn independent?
but with others making decisions for you, you don't have to use emotion...you just follow what they say. in a way, it's safer. you all know emotion can kill.

~*~

2003-03-19T19:39:00.000-08:00

okay, this is gonna be really quick, first of all, class has officially ended. at least--for my block. i'm currently in the vicinity though, because i'm meeting +aish+ for our guidance clearance and then this one later lunch.

by the way, sis, i waited a full hour for you last monday. i don't appreciate it, but i'll let it pass.
and miel, i'll try to email you. sorry, but finals week was really hectic. jeez, i still AM hectic now.

okay. more next time.

ciao.

2003-03-17T19:49:00.000-08:00
haven't been here in awhile. go to my blurty to read info on one of my friends. leaving again.

You're the sad smile,the one that regrets nearly
everything and is constantly wondering about
what could have been.You're not happy with your
situation and usually blame yourself because of
the bad things that have happened.Cheer up.

What Kind of Smile are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

You have a mysterious kiss. Your partner never
knows what you're going to come up with next;
this creates great excitement and arousal never
knowing what to expect. And it's sure to end
in a kiss as great as your mystery.

What kind of kiss are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

whoopee.

2003-03-13T02:04:00.000-08:00
i'm not happy. in fact, i'm pissed.
i'm really irritated towards -bianca-. she's...overly conceited. i mean, she beats me by more than a mile! *sighs* but she's darling when she needs to be.
i don't understand why the hell people just can't live and let live. or why can't they stop being judgemental? i mean, for once?
sheesh, it's frustrating when i have to be miss sugar and spice and everything supposedly nice just so people won't think the only thing my friends have is beauty and popularity. you all know the saying 'birds of the same feather flock together.'

miss sugar and spice and everything supposedly nice.

it's weird, and you guys probably won't even believe me, but that's how the whole damn block sees me. i've been called 'too nice for my own good'. everyone thinks i'm this sweet little thing who makes everyone fall in love at the drop of a hat. that isn't me.

there's more to me than that.

speaking of love, i suppose i should update you on what's happening between me and mine.

...

i'm gonna cry tonight when i think about it again. there isn't anything happening, and that's what hurts so much. we can't even talk anymore.
maybe it's the fact that everyone's so busy...i mean, finals and all. but it hurts to hear that awkward silence on the phone when before...
well...we could stay on for hours and never notice. it's just...

damn. *sighs*

maybe it's just a phase all...i don't even know what we are anymore.

on yet another disturbing topic, i haven't had the dream lady harle foresaw, but i figured out the last part of her reading connects with my past.

i went back again, de ar sis ters. i found out that...well, i was part of something...something like WE have. but i was afraid i would taint their circle, so i left...

i don't want to put it all in here because...*sighs* i'm still scared.

i'm still running.

out.

2003-03-12T03:50:00.000-08:00
i met with the wed nes day gro up, but the thing that stick in my mind up to now is harle's reading.

it was all true. i would rant, but i exhausted all my good mood in my blurty. i'm gonna think dark, pensive thoughts tonight.

that is all you need to know.

on other, less creepy news, i went back to school around 3.00pm, thinking that i missed two subjects when---lo and behold!---aforementioned subjects were cancelled, so in essence, i didn't miss boring ol' philippine history and theology. =P so, nii-chan, you have no reason to get all hyped up over my cutting class. ^_^

go me. i'll reserve the creeped-out thoughts for tonight.

^isis_ of the +moon+

2003-03-10T22:12:00.000-08:00
i'm getting a fic log of my own. =P
i'm duly inspired by the blog series my sister is responsible for. for those who haven't seen it...tsk tsk tsk...shame on YOU, mortals, yes YOU!!!!!!!!

*shakes head*

i'm a little deranged. or was it demented? or disturbed?

ah...

this one's disturbed. i think -sirri- was the one demented.

that leaves me deranged...not much choice in the matter.
then again it's really applicable.

awright, i don't have class today because intro to comm (1.30-3.00) and computer was cancelled. happy me.
i had to go to school nine-thirty in the MORNING, though. hung out with -alysia- and -aish-.

oh, and i HAVE to hand it to them, as far as i've noticed, they're the only ones who don't believe me when i say "i'm okay", or any of the sort. i guess they DO know me. i hope they don't get so attached, though, i don't want to hurt them.

okay, i'm gonna put up the URL for my blurty. *waits for cheers to die down* go see. ^_^

over and out.

2003-03-09T22:56:00.000-08:00

You are a Silent Dreamer...
Some say your a freak, others say your very
blunt, but the truth is your just
misunderstood. You understand a lot more then
you let on, but that doesn't stop you from
letting them think what they want. Who cares?
Your you, that's all thats importaint.

What kind of Dreamer are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

i choose to hide from what i need
if i can love, then i can bleed
the only one left to blame is me
dreaming ends and nothing's free...

dreaming dies tonight with me...

2003-03-09T22:29:00.000-08:00
i got the same thing months ago. i wonder if i can curl up and die now.

borderline

Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla

why doesn't anyone notice it's all an act? everyone thinks i'm little miss sweetie, everyone's darling, everyone's friend...can't they see i'm dying inside?
forgive my pride, but i can't show it...

everything's an act.

I Am

Which tarot card are you?

i got this too.

when will i begin to live again?

2003-03-09T19:53:00.000-08:00
this is a quiz i lifted off...someone's blog. i don't remember which. i think it was melina's. i'm stuck in a pathetic excuse for a computer lab in st. scho with a migraine and a hang-over to keep me company, plus my own dark thoughts.

You are track #5, 'Rooftop'. You are perhaps one of
the saddest tracks in the soundtrack, a story
of how Jim wishes for the promise of a future.
Cheer up! You're gonna be fine.

Which Song From the 'Treasure Planet' Soundtrack Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

i can accept this. duh, isn't it true? i can't believe i've gotten so good in acting i even fool myself.

You are Elizabeth Bathory. (The bloodcountess)
Legend tells us that you, this very rich,
beautiful and high born woman tortured and
murdered some 650 young women and bathed in
their warm blood to keep yourself beautiful.
In some stories, it is said you have drank thier
blood as well. You were a sexual sadist on a
grand scale.
Ah vanity is your downfall. For shame!

Which Imfamous criminal are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

this is nice. i think i can accept this too.

i'm out. please. comment on the quizzies.

2003-03-05T18:56:00.000-08:00
i'm actually not very happy right now. i'm in school HOURS before my class, which starts at one-thirty. we have a presentation that -ginny- and i fought about. we're STILL fighting. i just think it's vaguely unfair that i get blamed for -ashley's- lax behavior.

honestly now. what do they expect?
gee, i'm sorry i have a life.

if i posted two days ago, i'd have gone to my dark blog. but i'm feeling just plain TIRED here, so i decided to post here. don't bother checking out the said blog, it hasn't been updated.

i'm tired.

but last night was fun. bonded quite a bit with my brothers. it made my day worth it, since i wasn't able to spend much time with the gi rls and ekai wasn't there.

god.

i miss them all.

i miss this one as well. everyone's busy. i haven't felt this alone in years.
and as for athens, i just wish we could go back to not caring about the world and focusing on our own happiness for once. but we can't do that anymore.

distance never separates two hearts that really care...

i hope you remember that.

i haven't been this lonely since last year.
then again maybe i just haven't noticed.

out.

2003-02-27T01:23:00.000-08:00
awright, i'm looking for pics and info on MY man.
i'll prolly post next time. btw, can anyone tell me how to post a piccie? thanks. =)

over and [almost] out.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

You are Quistis!

Which Final Fantasy 8 character are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

NOW i'm out! ^_^

2003-02-27T01:02:00.000-08:00
awright. i've been online for almost an hour now but i've been busy going around everyone else's blogs. first things first, melina-dearest actually beat me to the punch, but the reason why i'm on cloud nine as of late is that---*takes deep breath*---viggo mortensen is very much single, and as far as i'm concerned, very much MINE. as far as i see, that's all that friggin' matters! ^_^
and for dignity's sake, i SO did not go crazy over him over caramel sundae and fries. i just...happened to...uh. you know. go a little insane? a few squeals here and there, a hot flush spreading on my cheeks...ah...

*ahem*

anyway. SHEESH. it's not like i'm head over bloody heels in for him, i just think he's the hottest thing since sugar.

did i mention i can't live without sugar?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

any~way, i had a sleep-over at -ginny's- house last monday/tuesday. it was just me and -ginny- and -aish-. did i mention last week that they'd been fighting since kingdom come? well, y'all be glad to know i managed to make them reach a sort of 'unspoken' compromise. they're back to being civil and all. we bonded over strawberry sundaes, KFC fried chicken, cadbury chocs, and scary movie 2. =P
go me!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Viggo

The Extremely Silly Which Stereotypical Member of the Fellowship Are You Quiz
brought to you by Quizilla

*sighs*

help me PLEASE!!!!!!! i am DEEPLY, TOTALLY head over heels for the sod. *glares* yes, it's taken approximately more than a month for it to sink in. GOD! they don't make actors like they used to. he's like all-in-one!

^actor
^photographer
^artist
^poet

OHFORCHRISSAKES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GETOVERHIMWOMAN!!!!!!!!!!!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~

i'm posting a quiz i took on my dark blog. be back later. ^_^

2003-02-23T16:41:00.000-08:00
*sighs and yawns*

i haven't slept. i'm in school three hours before my class because i had to submit a project. i'm bored, sleepy, hungry, and the stupid PC in st. scho's computer lab is slower than growing grass.

oh, yah, and i left my scientific calculator when the only class we have is STATISTICS.

life is beautiful. *winces and shifts*
i can't feel my f*cking legs. they're cramping up. desks like these weren't made for tall people. *snorts* ugh.

i'm happy. it isn't very obvious, is it? ^_^

ugh. seriously. brushing my bitching aside, i had a pretty good fri day da te. i didn't get to meet the chief justice, but hey, that's fine. what matters is that i had fun. that kinda made up for my sucky week. the night was capped off by a marathon bonding session with my twin and my doggie nii-chan.

so you see, bad day or not, people like them make life worth it.

this is krys signing out to finalize viggo-my-love's marital status. ^_^
later.

2003-02-20T19:39:00.000-08:00
i'm currently in netopia with my twin brother, who has finally gotten up and posted. *raises eyebrow* about time too! he's going through MY blog--*raises eyebrow again*--and is commenting on the quizzes i got. *flushes* we're twins all right!

took a quiz off melina's site. whoopee.

You're Yoji's eyes. You stay the same color - deep
emerald green - in both the anime and the
manga. Deep and gentle, your eyes can be very
persuasive, and they often say things you'd
never say with your lips.

Which Weiss Guy's Eyes are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

oooh. are my eyes THAT expressive? NOT! *pouts* i can wish though. i wanna check out other quizzies...i'm trying to convince zacky to take some too. *snickers* i think it worked.

You are The Celestial Goddess. You rule over the
Heavens and have a fim grip on space and the
universe. Your keen intellect makes you a
person to take time to stare at the stars -
just to see what they look like.

What Goddess Of Beauty Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

i like! ^_^ now this one would be a lot appropriate for dione. ;>

You're an Audrey Hepburn. Classic and graceful,
Timeless and elegant. You have impeccable taste
and manners to match. People are always
comfortable around you because you are the
perfect hostess. Kind and unselfish, you are
often looked up to by other women.

Which Classic Beauty Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

that's all cuz my twin has to go...therefore i may as well go. =>

2003-02-17T20:53:00.000-08:00
hm.
what am i doing outside school an hour and a half before my class?
*sighs*
long story. to make things easier, i'll give a brief outline on how bad my days are starting to get.

1. i didn't sleep two days ago, so i slept right after i got home yesterday, thereby missing my dinner again.
2. my school friends [i shudder if i use the term 'barkada'] are fighting among themselves again, and being by far the most mature one, i'm the one stuck in the crossfire.
3. i woke up 5.00 am this morning and wasn't able to fall asleep again because of a nasty dream.

cut.
said nasty [nasty, in a BAD way, you hentai peeps!!!] dream consisted of me:
a.) drowning in black water (not getting buried alive--my mistake, lady harle).
b.) getting stuck in a room with a mirror. breaking said mirror and getting blinded by the shards.

and, for a fitting ending:

c.) standing in a room filled with blood and unidentified dead bodies (body count would be approximately 10), holding a bloody butcher knife.

WHAT IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?

that would explain my silence over brunch, my darlings. *sighs*
my apologies.
plus, my days are going down the drain because i'm constantly fatigued and there's this odd drained feeling.

one ray of sunshine, at least we're getting back on track. *sighs* starting to bond again and christ, i'm relieved, to say the least. another thing to look forward to is the fact that tomorrow is wed nes day once mo re.

thank god for small favors.

anyway, took a quiz i lifted from the doggie's blog.

so i like nerdy guys. can i help it they're usually absolutely adorable and only the most interesting people in this world? there's nothing like a guy who's intellectually stimulating and so damn smart! philosophy helps too. ^_^
one more:

You are Oriya.

Which Yami no Matsuei Character are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

ooooooooh, i like that guy! btw, this particular series REEKS of yaoi, but christ, they're ALL HOT anyway!!! ^_^
he's so hot...*sighs dreamily* reminds me a bit of viggo, what with all the long brown hair and all the perfection--*trails off* *blushes*
did i say that aloud?

any~way, i have to run. sis, i know i said i'd post on this one, but...well...it's so looong! i'm lazy again. so shoot me.

over and out.

2003-02-16T22:55:00.000-08:00
that sucks. *glares*

i just posted--or tried to. damn thing hanged.
i am so not in the mood to re-type everything, so i'm just gonna go.

Your Heart is Grey

What Color is Your Heart?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-02-14T02:55:00.000-08:00
all right. i just posted something on the other side.
go see.

on other news, i'm okay now. basically. a little shaken by the ferocity of my *ehem* emotions.

*sigh*

and i thought i was a freezer? i thought i was numb?

i wouldn't mind going back to curling up in someone's arms and hiding from the world.
at least then i felt safe.

over and out.

2003-02-13T03:10:00.000-08:00
did i say that was last? i lied. sis, check this out. i have no idea who this is, but i thought you might be interested.

You are Leila deSilver.

You're a natural leader. You will fight tooth and claw to defend your beliefs and the people who trust you, but you still doubt your own self-worth at times. Although you're renowned for your sharp tongue and hot temper, you do have a weary, softer side, you just don't normally let it show except around close friends and relatives.

Which Brotherhood of the Blade character are you?

hah. cool. i like it. 'independent' is right. 'sharp tongue and hot temper' is even better. 'doubt your self-worth' is the best.
but i checked the others and thought this is more applicable, with me and my famous ego.

You are Nylessa Drakely.

Pretty, sassy, sometimes snippy, you are both the girl of men's dreams, and their worst nightmare. You sail through life smiling, but leave behind a trail of broken hearts. You do have your good points -- you can be quite sweet and kind, trustworthy and reliable... as long as it doesn't get in the way of your having a good time.

Which Brotherhood of the Blade character are you?

please comment. ^_^ that goes for everyone else.

2003-02-13T02:59:00.000-08:00

Aragorn

Who is your Ideal Lord of the Rings (male) Mate?
brought to you by Quizilla

i already knew this. last one.

You like to be alone and see everything around you.
You like to do things alone. You're a Fall fairy
but fall is a very pretty and soft time of year.

What kind of fairy are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

i'm out.

2003-02-13T02:34:00.000-08:00

Arwen

Which Lord of the Rings Elf are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

this is the first LOTR quiz i took that dodn't give me either -galadriel- or -aragorn-.
rockin'.
going on a quiz rampage to temporarily forget what i ranted about here. i'd like everyone to check it out, by the way. it isn't everyday i tell people what i really feel.
on to the quizzies. looking for new stuff. you know. fun.

#41

What Dave Matthews Song Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

this is nice. makes me sound like a good person.

2003-02-13T01:59:00.000-08:00
why is it that reading everyone else's blogs leaves me so damn depressed?
it's not even that it's depressing. it just seems to hurt to...ah. nevermind. what. the. FUCKING. HELL.

this sucks. when was the last time i felt so shitty? must have been pretty damn long if i can't even keep quiet about it. yeah. i should shut up. right about now.
but i'm human. i deserve a rant.

2003-02-11T00:07:00.000-08:00

Josh Hartnett

Which Hollywood pretty boy will you marry?
brought to you by Quizilla

aww hell. do i have to?

*ponders*

why doesn't viggo mortensen qualify as 'pretty'? oh christ, then again, he's hardly a BOY!!!!!

forty-friggin'-five~!!! *sobs* noooo...

i'm re-taking quizzes cause -- duh. people change. if you haven't noticed that by now you're more of an idiot than i thought.

Seductive Flirt

What Kind of FLIRT are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

i got a 'demure flirt' last time i tried that quiz. >< comments are welcome. and appreciated.

last one, since i should leave right about now.
first time i got this i got 'temptress'. now its:

You are a dark goddess!

Which Ultimate Beautiful Woman are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

i can handle that. ^_^

2003-02-10T23:31:00.000-08:00
online again courtesy of st. scho's computer class. =P hehehe...i'm so mean. i've endeared myself to my beloved prof in such a way that she ignores the fact i never listen to her anyway.
*after a pause*
whassat? midterm grade? *frowns* christ, i've cut her class more times than i care to count. (she doesn't check attendance regularly anyway.) god knows how much i've missed. *shrugs* oh well. the friggin' hell. i could probably catch up. [you would note, of course, that the keyword is 'probably'.] who am i kidding? of course i'll catch up. >.< like, if i really tried.
-alysia- and the gang pointed out that it would do well to actually utilize my 'superior' iQ. enquote: "you're smarter than the lot of us. you just really don't pass the f*cking requirements."
*sheepish grin* i have to agree. my grades are atrocious. i get B minuses when i''d automatically get an A. i'd get ninety friggin' seven on my finals and still get really low because of the damn assignments. >.<
i so need to get my priorities straight.
i'm pretty sure that my 'priorities' don't include guys. >P
but hey, i sure could use an inspiration right now. *grins* he's a helluva a best friend. i'm one lucky b*tch to find someone who can handle me. now, about my romantic life, nothing is happening. i'm getting more crushes than usual, and one particular darling of mine is rapidly developing into a full-out puppy love-ish type.

too bad i can never have him.

it's complicated. someone very dear to me loves him anyway. who am i to stand in the way of something i'll never have?
*sniffs*
depressing, or what? it prolly won't last anyway.
but as i told my dear twin: "a moment of joy is better than a lifetime of bitterness."
my personal translation being: don't be afraid to risk your all for someone you love. if it doesn't work out, there are always the memories. you can tell the world that you were happy. you loved and were loved. once.

i'm in a poignantly melancholic mood right now, and i can't help missing the security a steady relationship always offered me. knowing that someone was missing me. loving me. feeling protected and just for one precious moment, cherished.

how was that for a sad reflection from the all high-and-mighty b*tch Goddess?

comments and reactions are welcome. please.

2003-02-09T19:10:00.000-08:00
this is just a quickie cuz i'm due to meet some of the kids in mcdo--right about now. just couldn't resist getting online and printing the lyrics m'luv got for me. ^_^ took one quiz just to wrap this up:

You are the fox.

Saint Exupery's 'The Little Prince' Quiz.
brought to you by Quizilla

hmmm...well, i wanted the pilot, but who am i to argue with what's supposed to be the truth? T_T

i'm out.

2003-02-06T19:36:00.000-08:00
awright, one more quiz to wrap it up. >.< how emo am i? i wanna see if i have ANY emotion left. ^_^

Freezer. You feel nothing and wish to feel nothing
so you find peace in the way you think,
however, your emotions are more nuetral than
balanced. Coldness and tolerance can be the
ways of a passive heart.

How Emotional Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

and this???? i am WHO????

I am...

Which Fellowship Actor are YOU?

good thing i like this song. ^_^

You're "Hands Clean". You have reconciled
with the past and are ready to move on and see
what the future holds for you.

Which Alanis Morissette song are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

last one, i swear. ^_^

2003-02-06T19:08:00.000-08:00
i'm back in netopia with melina and zacky. the guy--*glares*--insists on playing cs instead of actually working on his blog. *sniffs disdaintfully* if i weren't his twin i'd---*trails off* *evil smile*---hmmm....maybe i will...*lifts eyebrow*

i'm taking quizzies again.. :) go see:

You are an IDEALISTIC VIRGIN.

What Kind of Virgin Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

'idealistic'? what is that supposed to mean?

anyway, i've always known i was considered to be sexy, but what do you think about this?

You charming girl, you're Rose McGowan.

What sexy girl are you
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-02-05T23:31:00.000-08:00
awright cheres, i'm very happy. ^_^

no, i don't care that i skipped all three of my afternoon subjects yesterday. i don't care that i spent only thirty minutes in school. [or even less?]. i don't even mind the fact that valentine's day is just around the corner...
[and incidentally, these kids HATE it!]

what matters is that yesterday was a grrrrrreat wednesday. ^_^
i missed kai though... *puppy dog eyes*

so...what happened yesterday? weeeellllll...i got to school late for the first class [art]. that was 11.00. we got out of class 11.30. i ate with -ashley- and the gang, went over to netopia to find them [minus -ekai-] there, went to mcdo to hang. ^_^ and then i spent SEVEN FULL HOURS with -zacky- and -mai- and -charles-.

i'm out.

2003-02-04T20:57:00.000-08:00
i'm in netopia with the kids--or most of them
...-mac- and -charlie- are here as well. debating on whether or not to cut phil. his. for the nth time--decided not to, as am far too afraid of getting dropped from that subject. -_- more to add to my list of disgraces? i think not. >.<

oui. that sucks. i'm veeeerrrry, veeeeeeerrrrrry tired, and i just got here!!!
christ on a trampoline. a bunch of vvvvveeeeeeeerrrrrrrry noisy lasallians behind me. *snorts slightly* i'd post in my dark blog but i'm not *that* mad--yet. i'm just plain...not happy. *sighs* me ish shad...*puppy dog eyes* won't anybody come take me home?

You're a Non-box.

What box do you get put in?
brought to you by Quizilla

i'm sad...*sighs*
dame, i'm in need of a good old fashioned hug [which is rare]. from a good old fashioned guy [which is even rarer].
i'm out. i'm bored.

2003-02-04T01:56:00.000-08:00
i'm happy now. ^_^

*sighs* just posted on the other side, so to speak. i was supremely pissed then, although, i hafta admit, my famous temper has simmered down. *cough* yes, quite. and -kale's- blog is up, for those interested. =D tomorrow's wednesday, and i am finally gonna get the chance to break free. oh but there's something i forgot to rant about...back to the the other side, luvs.

+++

anyway, took another quizzie. *cough* uhm *cough* people will remember that i said a few months back that i am so not girlfriend material? check this out.

-Perfect- You're the perfect girlfriend. Which
means you're rare or that you cheated :P You're
the kind of chick that can hang out with your
boyfriend's friends and be silly. You don't
care about presents or about going to fancy
placed. Hell, just hang out. You're just happy
being around your boyfriend.

What Kind of Girlfriend Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

*soft laugh* that kinda nullifies all arguments, yes?

2003-02-02T22:56:00.000-08:00
i am friggin' out.

2003-02-02T22:54:00.000-08:00
AND HE IS OLD!!!!!!!!!!!!

*sobs* mommeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

don't even ask unless you want to be personally decapitated. *glares*

h-o-l-y m-o-t-h-*-r-_-_-_-_-_-_!!!!!!!!!!!

*runs off screaming*

2003-02-02T22:46:00.000-08:00
oh hell! oh, dear god!

my dears...why didn't anyone tell me...-viggo mortensen- is a poet, photographer, and everything in between?
*crashes down*
christ...he's a *friggin'* GENIUS!
no WONDER i find him way too hot-and-spicy...

*shakes head*

*sniffs*

i can't take this.

2003-02-02T22:38:00.000-08:00
cher...i'm just tweaking...Ü kick me later. have you seen my layout?Ü ~mel

2003-02-02T22:26:00.000-08:00
hey ma cheres, -kale- has finally set up his own blog. i'd give you the URL but i'm not sure he wants it out yet. ^_^ i will ask permission from my labsh first.
on other news, -alysia- and i were supposed to go to robinson's place to watch the LOTR:TTT movie. [yes, we STILL haven't]. it's due to vanity more than anything. we--actually, she wanted to watch in posh li'l greenbelt theatre, but we never got around to going there. now, she's apparently desperate enough to watch anywhere. took a quiz. lookie lookie.

You're
Doomed to be Galadriel!

Still radiant and mysterious you reign supreme in the film version
of Lothlorien as you did in the book. However, it must be noted that
the scene where you turn all green and spooky frightens not only
Hobbits and children but the rest of humanity. Green is not really
your color, may we suggest a nice purple?

Which
other character of FOTR are you doomed to be?

brought
to you by

www.councilofelrond.com

*snorts*

my initial reaction was: holy crap, not again???

eh. why always -galadriel-? it kinda ruins the fact that i was called -arwen- in fourth year high and i am currently desperately head over heels for -aragorn- aka -viggo mortensen-. *pouts* no fair.
*ponders*

at least i'm still an elf, ne?

anyway, i'm going blog-hopping and laughing at some people's entries, thinking very deeply on others, or just plain not getting it.

oh by the way, about my li'l modeling stint last friday. i didn't trip or anything so that's good. -maia-cher- was there to witness my last catwalk [she missed the first part]. that's okay though, there was nothing to see. just me parading in a black gown that showed...a little too much. *evil laughter* go figure. there is nothing ANYONE has to know about what transpired backstage after the show. *mutters under breath* i treasure my pride way too much. ^_^

any~way, *sigh* dame, i'm supposed to be looking around for info on -vig-my-heart-. and~ i am gonna post a snippet on the group blog. ^_^

be right back! =D

2003-01-29T23:53:00.000-08:00
sis, disregard the comment abou the other blog. it might come in handy. ^_^

2003-01-29T23:49:00.000-08:00
awright, m'luv's, i'm going offline now. for one thing, i'm in the middle of class and trying vainly to finish my project. sis-my-luv, i'm deleting the other blog. this is enough for the moment. and besides, my famous temper has simmered down.

over and out.

2003-01-29T23:33:00.000-08:00

you have an inner cat eye-
aloof, distant, bossy

What's your inner eye?
brought to you by Quizilla

according to this, i am aloof, distant, and bossy. ^_^

but anyway, i had a whole lot of fun yesterday. finally met up with -maia-, -ekai-, -mac- [-zack- to me!], -charlie-doggy-, -charl-, and of course, -m'lina-. => dame, you guys are therapeutic. methinks you're exactly what i need. can't wait for the wednesdays to come! ^_^
laughed my head off at everyone's apparent hyperactivity...and i toast to the fact that we godesses agree that we don't need a man to keep smiling. we rule!

line for the day: [from -maia-]--> 'lick my boots, worm!'

took another quizzie. and i who know next to nothing and almost everything about final fantasy ten, got this:

You are Rikku. Wo0t.

Which Final Fantasy X Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-01-29T23:16:00.000-08:00
I Am

Which tarot card are you?
Spiritual enlightenment, inner illumination, hidden power. Link between seen and unseen. Balance of positive and negative forces. Receptivity. Unseen guidance.
A young woman sits on a throne holding a scroll labeled "Tora" meaning "law." On her breast is the sign of the meeting of heaven and earth, the Maltese cross. Her crown is the full orb supported by horns, the crown ofthe Mother Goddess Isis, who rules all things changeable, shown by the moon at her feet. Her power, upon which her throne rests, derives from the creative principle of duality, shown by the two pillars of light and darkness. To those who know and love her she dispenses the sweet fruit of the world itself, symbolized by the pomegranites.

I think this is as close to Goddess of the Moon. =) what say thee, mortals?

2003-01-28T00:16:00.000-08:00

What Is Your Animal Personality?
brought to you by Quizilla

this is nice. :)

*sigh* i'm bored. i have modeling practice later...bloody hell. i didn't ask for this. -ginny- dragged me friggin' in. under normal circumstances, i would have loved modeling [it's somewhere in my blood, i think...] but not in this school where people misunderstand it. i'm not particularly f+cking beautiful [in my bloody opinion] but i look damn good enough. and of COURSE everyone thinks all i have is a pair of chameleon brown eyes and virgin hair.

zats it. no brain, the IQ the size of a peanut, and an attitude of a true-blue b*tch.

okay. i can handle the attitude part. it's probably true, for all i care.

but *i* have no brain? *no* IQ?

they have a bloody war on their friggin' hands.

*folds arms across chest*

pardon my french but...: f+ck them all to hell.

2003-01-28T00:00:00.000-08:00
back online...dear god, i need my net access. daddy dear insists we focus on fixing our car before the beloved pc. oh HELL! *pouts* did i mention my creative juices stop flowing with NO keyboard to type with? *mutters under breath* manual labor, puh-leeze...that's exactly the reason i don't have any notes for any subject.

took yet another quiz from my sister's niichan---does that make him my brother? nyup, don't think so.

ANIME QUIZ - Which Escaflowne Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

i like folken. but christ i didn't want to *be* him. *rolls eyes and sighs*
weelll, to each his own, then. *wry grin*

over and out.

2003-01-23T02:42:00.000-08:00

What Type Of Anime Character Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

"You're A Bishoujo (Attractive Young Woman)! You are loved by all, and you know it. You love the attention you get, because or your sense of style, and perfect face. Congrats."

orooooooooooooooo????????? @_@

i will have to get back to you on that.

2003-01-23T02:35:00.000-08:00

What color of kitten would you be?
brought to you by Quizilla

i'm a siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiilver kittie!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*mrew* *perks up and chases tail around room*

siiiiilveeeeeeer!!!!!!!!!! yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ^_^

[note to self: a snickers bar and seven extra creamy kisses after dismissal is NOT advisable.]

2003-01-23T02:29:00.000-08:00
*sigh*

waiting for my dad to pick me up...back in my fave netcaf with -alysia- who's busy chatting on mIrc...*shakes head*
this girl can never get enough. ^_^ can't wait for saturday! it's -deirdre's- debut...i know i already mentioned that but did i mention four of my secret crushes are there?
the -gang- has got to excuse me for being so psyched. =)

oh well...

You are blue. You are somewhat innocent, in the fact that your genius only extends to the physical world. You have a false sense of contentness. You are usually the quiet one, the genius. Everyone can count on you to help when they have problems, but you only fall short of being able to solve your own.

What inner color are you?

i like the falling-short-on-solving my own problems part, but the piccie...oh puh-leeze.

2003-01-22T23:45:00.000-08:00
i'm currently stuck in computer class. [ugh]. i'm supposed to be making a webbie. helllooo? that is so second year. *pouts* *perks up* on other news, i've finally talked to -kale- after almost a month of stagnation. =P did i mention absence makes the heart grow fonder? i missed him. *slight flush* did i say that out loud?

whoops.

anyway, out on another quiz rampage.

What Lord of the Rings Male and Mood Do You Desire?
brought to you by Quizilla

that is too true for comfort. i definitely like men on the distant side. the more challenging, the better. ^_^

now this one:

What's your sexual appeal?
brought to you by Quizilla

*shudders* utterly irresistible? i'll have to get back to you on that. ;>

2003-01-22T00:29:00.000-08:00

What Kind of Virgin Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

well at least it says i have a 'good attitude'. i think i'll fill this with quizzes before the bell rings in my next class. [did i mention i'm not supposed to be here? no? oh well....]

well, i was also called a bitch goddess in fourth year. is that a good thing?

What swear word are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

crap. this world is way confusing. i get called a nice person, a dark goddess, a bitch, a temptress.

can't y'all f*cking make up your minds??

2003-01-22T00:17:00.000-08:00
oh, this is good. this is very very good. ^_^

What element would you rein over? (For Girls)
brought to you by Quizilla

ze goddess iz back in ze house.
when was the last time i was called that? =) too long.

it's weird, but seeing -fiona-, -ophelia-, -sirri-, and -melina- brought back a rush off sudden nostalgia...and a bit of melancholy as well. oh sheesh...it's plain as day. i miss them all.

and to think all these feelings were brought about by that word: goddess.

there was no other but me, so i guess that accounts for my rather inflated ego. [which, by the way, i manage to pull off anyway.] ^_~

i'm out.

^isis_
dark, like the night

2003-01-21T23:56:00.000-08:00
i saw mi angelina at pizza hut a while ago...finally met -maia- and -ekai-. of course, -charl- was there. =)

i can't help but feel rahter envious that she actually has friends who can carry on a conversation without drifting into the topic of men every minute or so. sure, -aish- and the guys are great, but hey, trust me to find fault [and boredom] in popularity.

oh dear god, popular is the last thing i want to be.

i have a fashion show next week. i'm bailing out.

touche.

What's your Inner European?
brought to you by Quizilla

2003-01-21T00:19:00.002-08:00
'i never change'? [-melina's- blog, about me: january 21]

angel, change is too dangerous. don't fret, m'love, i'll change sooner when you least expect it...but til then, rest assured i'll be the almighty supreme bitch goddess i've always been.

now y'all tell me: is that a good thing?

2003-01-20T23:56:00.000-08:00

Who is your Ideal Lord of the Rings (male) Mate?
brought to you by Quizilla

SEXUAL magnetism? *muffles giggles* i was thinking ANIMAL magnetism. *rofl*

ta ta mi angelas!

2003-01-20T23:49:00.000-08:00
tweak, tweakity, tweak.xp *pbth*

haldir....haldiiiiir.Ü

_________
~+ m'lina

2003-01-20T23:43:00.000-08:00
took a test [which i lifted from -melina's- site] and i have to say i LOVED the result. ^_^
can't anyone comment? *pouts*

So which LOTR woman are you? Hmm??
made by Michelle at EmptySpace.

i like. =D

now for the villain...*checks other page* *lifts brow*

So which LOTR Villain are you? Hmm??
made by Michelle at EmptySpace.

sis...is it just me...or does this strike you as too much of -ripley-?

*crashes down*

til next time, mes amis.

2003-01-20T23:38:00.000-08:00
.....?

2003-01-19T23:14:00.000-08:00
back again and am thankfully in a better mood.

for one, i've bought my dress for deirdre's debut and i'm actually really excited 'cuz four lifelong crushes of mine are there....
*flushes*

and i'm right beside -melina-, god knows when was the last time we've had time to bond like this. *sidelong glance* *grins*

we're waiting for our high school barkada [yes, they were the topic last january thirteen...] and i've missed them like friggin' hell.

i'm swearing off love [and lust] ;p for the meantime, just 'cuz i realize that i am *so* not girl friend material...at least, not anymore.
and to think -kale- and i almost made it work.

god damned harlot. i can't help but look for someone with more spontaneity.
[harlot? nah. i'm just the most seductive virgin i know]

spontaneity. and the ever-elusive sensitivity.

i found both in -andrei-.

and i've known him forever. damned if i haven't fallen. damned if i don't love -kale- anymore. [and by the way, i do, i do, i do...]

and then there's...someone else.

oh dear god. i need to get my priorities straightened out.

*sighs*

over and out.

2003-01-13T00:58:00.000-08:00
i am up and i am alive.

and i have no idea if that is a good thing.

it took quite some time for me to realize that things have changed, and are changing, and that -they- are drifting.
i'm losing them. hell, yeah. or maybe if i weren't so friggin' selfish i'd have noticed i lost them a long time ago.

or maybe they were never mine.

i walked by the -tambayan- lunchtime today and i couldn't help but stop and stare. how many of them do i have left? how many have i /all too carelessly/ let go? and how many will i never see again?

from thirteen, to nine, to seven, to five, to four, to one.

i'm not fooling myself by pretending that they miss everything as much as i do. they're happy now. finally.
and i have no right to intrude.

but i'm bitter.
oh hell, yeah. i'm very bitter.

don't they know? don't they care?

haven't they learned anything?

you'd think they'd know.

what they see is not what they get.

it never is.

A different quiz, what strange type of person are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

Evil lurkes beneath your skin...but you already knew that, didn't you? A mastermind at trickery, and ready to dupe those fools who dare come near you, your friends are few, but you know they'll be there for you. If they ever have someone that needs..."taking care of", they know your number.

2003-01-12T23:57:00.000-08:00
hmmm...just got out of euthenics class and *ugh*...the speakers seriously s*cked. hell. anyway, went on a harry potter surfing spree for my character/s, paige and selena ashborough. not yet done though.

checked out my 'personality disorder' and freaked out.
/it was soooo appropriate./

Which Personality Disorder Do You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla

*sighs*

i'm not evil. i'm misunderstood.

free enneagram test

but then again, i'm not nice. i'm...too manipulative for my own good.

*sighs*

oh, go figure.

2003-01-07T00:21:00.000-08:00
whooopsie.

note to self: do not fiddle around with html.

*whacks self*

-melina-, a little help here....

*snorts*

oh geez. isn't this absolutely great?

well, in fairness, i like this look better, but the random stuff on the side...[links, for one] kinda got lost.

dame.

anyway. talked to -severn- [with me loitering through the hallway of school] a while ago.
he said something that made me wonder exactly how my personality goes. try THIS for size:

What sexy girl are you
brought to you by Quizilla

oh well. i can handle wild and honest, i s'pose.

deeply loving...well...
anyway, if anyone doubts my manipulative prowess, take a look at this...

What Color Eyes Should You Have?
brought to you by Quizilla

hah. i am evil, dude. ;p

worship me.

2003-01-06T18:33:00.000-08:00
::10.24am, january 7, 2003::

oh, hot dame.

i'm sitting in a computer shop with -alysia-, -bianca-, and -ginny- flanking me, everyone totally going crazy over a computer project they have been slaving over for the past two weeks.

of course, i am already done. =P

so here i am updating everyone on...several things. for one, my computer at home is on the blink [and it SUCKS, man!]. two: i read the three sisters trilogy by nora roberts [except for the first...nell's...] and my mom, who read the second one, 'heaven and earth', burst out laughing after the first few chapters or so.

'is it just me, or is this character so you?'

of course i freeze in the middle of eating and glare.

'WHAAAAAAAT? i am SOOO not impulsive. and i'm not THAT opinionated, i just happen to think that....'

and i trail off, muttering vague obscenities as she dissolvs into giggles.

the hell.

okay. so i kick ass. and i'm not afraid of 'anything in this world' [to quote from U2].

but hell, i'm not THAT...loud.

i think. oh help me, dear christ. @_@

dame. sh*t and shinola.

this is me, signing off and deciding i will be back when my famous mpd isn't flaring up.

[shut UP, sora.]

end
::10.32am, january 7, 2003::

2002-12-21T22:18:00.000-08:00
i did this last ::4.40 pm-December 20, 2002::

~ * ~ * ~ * ~
Scared myself last night again.
Stupid, STUPID girl!
I’m an idiot. I’m pretty much aware of that now.
How stupid can you be to regress yourself with no anchor, no ‘proper’ training, no ritual, no experience, no nothing? It was scary ‘cause it actually worked. Even scarier ‘cause I didn’t know I could do it. Got stuck somewhere in my past and probably wouldn’t have gotten out if…

I don’t even know how I got out.

Maybe someone knew the shit I was getting into and pulled me out. But who? WHO???
Not Melina. I talked to her right after—well—maybe as soon as I could. She was very…composed. Not very surprising. Definitely not Charl. I mean…well…I don’t know how I know. It’s just…a gut feeling. That goddamn instinct I thought I’d hidden from. Intuition doesn’t always help. Sometimes it just gets in the way.
Took a quiz a few weeks ago. I got this:

Your magical style is Witch.

What type of Magic do you work?. Take the Magical Style Quiz by Paradox

A witch. Right.

I’m a goddamned cynic, that’s what I am. I wasn’t born one, I didn’t study [at least, not long and hard], and I definitely don’t do it |regularly|. Definitely not.
The image is pretty though.

Anyway. Went quiz happy [blame Melina and Charlotte] a few days ago. Seems that my obsession with the moon stemmed from this:

Where Did Your Soul Originate?
brought to you by Quizilla

Oh. Jeez. That was pretty cool. And I didn’t get a “dark goddess” when I took this other quiz, but I suppose this is okay [if rather inappropriate].

Which Ultimate Beautiful Woman are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Uh. Well. I’ll have to get back to you on that. I don’t remember tempting any—uh—

Oh. Right. I did that already, I think.

Anyway.

^Isis_

Primary Ability: Farseeker Farseekers posses the ability to communicate over great distances via telepathy. They are great friends who know when they're needed, and seem to be able to detect others thoughts.

Secondary Ability: Futureteller Futuretellers have an uncanny knack of knowing what is going to happen, well before anybody else. Alot of futuretellers have truedreams, whereas some, like Brydda, have what they call a 'sixth sense'. Futuretellers are usually very quiet, and reserved, yet they are loyal and trustworthy.
What is your Misfit Talent?

Disorder	Rating
Paranoid:	Moderate
Schizoid:	Low
Schizotypal:	Moderate
Antisocial:	Moderate
Borderline:	Very High
Histrionic:	High
Narcissistic:	Moderate
Avoidant:	Moderate
Dependent:	Moderate
Obsessive-Compulsive:	Moderate
-- Personality Disorder Test - Take It! --